04.19.11
{I believe I have some explaining to do}
I have been on a hiatus for a while. Life has come flooding in ever direction possible. By all means, don't take that as complaining. This is the short and long of it; so you may want to take a deep breath with me and let it out slowly. {A useful breathing technique when one gets overwhelmed. ha-ha}
I've gotten extremely busy since my last post, literally. I have decided to follow my path diligently and full hearted. I've nose dived into it actually and remembered to plug my nose. I've become active in church, which means I'm in a lot{3 actually} of our life groups and am taking a 6 week Bible study. My week goes something like this: Monday: {every other Monday is a different life group}1 Life Group, Tuesday: Gym and reading, Wednesday: Bible study, Thursday: {Every other week} Life group and reading, Friday: Reading.
I'm busy and I have to keep on top of my home, love on my Hubby and make sure me and my Grace howl daily. Life is happily busy which means my blog life has suffered; which I truly apologize for.
That was a bit of a throw up, of what has been going on. The detail of it all is this.
My life is being restructured. I would love to claim that I have been the one doing the restructuring, but I have not been. There has been a lot of demolition going on as well. I have had to learn how powerful prayer is, which is one of the most powerful things out there. I have been praying for certain things to happen in my life and that when my heart felt like they were happening I would act on them. Not just act, but live and do what was happening. Well, the statement be careful of what you ask for because it might just come true...is true. I have been praying that I would come back to Christ and would live a life that He has planned for me. I have come back to Him and coming back Home has been hard and glorious all in one. Just because I have chosen to live a Christian life, does not mean it is an easy life to live. Once we choose to live that life, there are adverse things that spring up to deter me from maintaining my new life style. That is where I'm being restructured. Putting my Faith in Jesus that what is happening around me WILL be handled in the only way it can; which is His way. Learning, or gathering the pieces of what my role is here in life. Learning that saying "The BIG Words and being Baptized" isn't the only outward act that I have to do to show my Faith. I am a child with so much knowledge to learn. In many ways I feel like I'm learning how to live my life all over again. Some of these new life lessons are hard, but what Glorious Grace is easy to gain?
These are some of the most important life lessons I'm re-learning.
-How I speak starts the chain reaction of how I act.
If I say offensive things, I will not only offend others, but feel offended. Praying often, if not all the time; will trickle down into my daily actions. It will change how I act and react to others. By changing the way I speak seems so simple, but it isn't. Its a simple change though to change the way I am perceived when I'm not speaking.
- What my role is in my marriage.
I am the heart of my husband and my house. Think of that statement literally. If we aren't happy, our husbands aren't and certainly our house doesn't feel happy to others. Remembering that the Bible says we are to love our Husbands like Jesus loves the church. I have to remember why I SO love my Husband--there are many reasons-- but because he is opposite than I am. The things I don't excel at, he does 10 fold and knowing I have to accept that I don't excel in those areas and try to grow in those ares. My husband and I were brought together for a reason, God has a plan for us. That plan does not mean we will life happily ever after everyday and we will go to bed cuddling. That plan is to make us better Christians and bring us closer to God. Which can mean it isn't sunshine and rainbows all the time. Simply learning to set aside all the big expectations we've set up for each other.
-There is only one person who can damage my relationship with Jesus.
Which is me and only me. All the material things in life can easily be put in front of Him, but the only person who sets the priority line is me. I am the only one who can build my relationship with Him and I am the only one who can tear it down. This is a hard lesson to learn when there are so many worldly things that can be appealing.
Those are just a taste of my re-learning life. My need and love to keep my blog updated is still alive and burning, but isn't as high up in the totem pole. I love all of the readers I have and hope you all would understand that I'd like to learn how to swim; because I've just dove head first into my Christian walk. If I don't make that my priority I will drown and my jump will have been pointless. In one of my groups I was referred to read 1Corinthians3. Which is where I am at.
With all my love,
03.27.11
The past Sunday 03.20.11 our Pastor did a sermon on Luke 15. The parables of Luke are said to be the best short stories ever written. I concur. Our sermon was on the first two parables; The lost sheep and the lost coin. I found the sheep hearder endearing and loved that parable, but The lost coin struck me. It is the shortest parable in Luke 15 and goes like this: {From the New Living Translation}
13 years ago I prayed the prayer of Salvation with my Grandma and got to see how clean kept and welcoming the path home was. I swiftly kept walking past that paved road determined to make my own way. My stubborness and pride blockaded me from even seeing the way back to that welcoming path.
I along the way fell into the mindset that if I were just a good person and did the right thing; how could God deny me? If he were an all loving God how could He cast me out of an Eternal life if I were a good person?
I am not sure, honestly, where in my brain I decided the mindset I had fallen into was wrong. All I can truly remember is, I started fishing around for what was truth. I found comfort in a couple of churches, but comfort isn't what I was looking for. I was looking for something that pushed me out of my comfort zone. A place that forced me to admit I was a hypocrite in the faith I had created in my head. October of last year I found that unsettling, but welcoming home.
I have since figured out how to breakdown that blockade I built. Have I broken it completely down, no. I am taking it down brick by brick though and in some cases I have even put some bricks back up in fear. I am a goal oriented person and my goal is to have a strong relationship with Jesus Christ. Can you imagine my frustration when I feel like I've exposed myself to this new church and then get embarrassed and put a few bricks back up to cover myself. I have been playing this game for 5 months. Today, I bulldozed that blockade. Today I re-dedicated myself to our forever forgiving and always loving Lord, Jesus Christ.
Today my life has been dramatically changed.
Today I put down my pride and bear all I have to proclaim.
Today I have been saved.
03.17.11
03.06.11
Today at church a chord was struck in my heart. {Which is typical, but something really clicked}
03.05.11
{I believe I have some explaining to do}
I have been on a hiatus for a while. Life has come flooding in ever direction possible. By all means, don't take that as complaining. This is the short and long of it; so you may want to take a deep breath with me and let it out slowly. {A useful breathing technique when one gets overwhelmed. ha-ha}
I've gotten extremely busy since my last post, literally. I have decided to follow my path diligently and full hearted. I've nose dived into it actually and remembered to plug my nose. I've become active in church, which means I'm in a lot{3 actually} of our life groups and am taking a 6 week Bible study. My week goes something like this: Monday: {every other Monday is a different life group}1 Life Group, Tuesday: Gym and reading, Wednesday: Bible study, Thursday: {Every other week} Life group and reading, Friday: Reading.
I'm busy and I have to keep on top of my home, love on my Hubby and make sure me and my Grace howl daily. Life is happily busy which means my blog life has suffered; which I truly apologize for.
That was a bit of a throw up, of what has been going on. The detail of it all is this.
My life is being restructured. I would love to claim that I have been the one doing the restructuring, but I have not been. There has been a lot of demolition going on as well. I have had to learn how powerful prayer is, which is one of the most powerful things out there. I have been praying for certain things to happen in my life and that when my heart felt like they were happening I would act on them. Not just act, but live and do what was happening. Well, the statement be careful of what you ask for because it might just come true...is true. I have been praying that I would come back to Christ and would live a life that He has planned for me. I have come back to Him and coming back Home has been hard and glorious all in one. Just because I have chosen to live a Christian life, does not mean it is an easy life to live. Once we choose to live that life, there are adverse things that spring up to deter me from maintaining my new life style. That is where I'm being restructured. Putting my Faith in Jesus that what is happening around me WILL be handled in the only way it can; which is His way. Learning, or gathering the pieces of what my role is here in life. Learning that saying "The BIG Words and being Baptized" isn't the only outward act that I have to do to show my Faith. I am a child with so much knowledge to learn. In many ways I feel like I'm learning how to live my life all over again. Some of these new life lessons are hard, but what Glorious Grace is easy to gain?
These are some of the most important life lessons I'm re-learning.
-How I speak starts the chain reaction of how I act.
If I say offensive things, I will not only offend others, but feel offended. Praying often, if not all the time; will trickle down into my daily actions. It will change how I act and react to others. By changing the way I speak seems so simple, but it isn't. Its a simple change though to change the way I am perceived when I'm not speaking.
- What my role is in my marriage.
I am the heart of my husband and my house. Think of that statement literally. If we aren't happy, our husbands aren't and certainly our house doesn't feel happy to others. Remembering that the Bible says we are to love our Husbands like Jesus loves the church. I have to remember why I SO love my Husband--there are many reasons-- but because he is opposite than I am. The things I don't excel at, he does 10 fold and knowing I have to accept that I don't excel in those areas and try to grow in those ares. My husband and I were brought together for a reason, God has a plan for us. That plan does not mean we will life happily ever after everyday and we will go to bed cuddling. That plan is to make us better Christians and bring us closer to God. Which can mean it isn't sunshine and rainbows all the time. Simply learning to set aside all the big expectations we've set up for each other.
-There is only one person who can damage my relationship with Jesus.
Which is me and only me. All the material things in life can easily be put in front of Him, but the only person who sets the priority line is me. I am the only one who can build my relationship with Him and I am the only one who can tear it down. This is a hard lesson to learn when there are so many worldly things that can be appealing.
Those are just a taste of my re-learning life. My need and love to keep my blog updated is still alive and burning, but isn't as high up in the totem pole. I love all of the readers I have and hope you all would understand that I'd like to learn how to swim; because I've just dove head first into my Christian walk. If I don't make that my priority I will drown and my jump will have been pointless. In one of my groups I was referred to read 1Corinthians3. Which is where I am at.
With all my love,
Until Next Time,
Peace & Love
03.27.11
The past Sunday 03.20.11 our Pastor did a sermon on Luke 15. The parables of Luke are said to be the best short stories ever written. I concur. Our sermon was on the first two parables; The lost sheep and the lost coin. I found the sheep hearder endearing and loved that parable, but The lost coin struck me. It is the shortest parable in Luke 15 and goes like this: {From the New Living Translation}
"Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Won’t she light a lamp and sweep the entire house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she will call in her friends and neighbors and say, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, there is joy in the presence of God’s angels when even one sinner repents."I have been on a journey of faith for over a year. It has tested me in more ways than I could write and tell you about. {If you give me enough time, next we meet I can try.} I have cried, prayed, rebelled, repented; all while trying to find my path back Home.
13 years ago I prayed the prayer of Salvation with my Grandma and got to see how clean kept and welcoming the path home was. I swiftly kept walking past that paved road determined to make my own way. My stubborness and pride blockaded me from even seeing the way back to that welcoming path.
I along the way fell into the mindset that if I were just a good person and did the right thing; how could God deny me? If he were an all loving God how could He cast me out of an Eternal life if I were a good person?
I am not sure, honestly, where in my brain I decided the mindset I had fallen into was wrong. All I can truly remember is, I started fishing around for what was truth. I found comfort in a couple of churches, but comfort isn't what I was looking for. I was looking for something that pushed me out of my comfort zone. A place that forced me to admit I was a hypocrite in the faith I had created in my head. October of last year I found that unsettling, but welcoming home.
I have since figured out how to breakdown that blockade I built. Have I broken it completely down, no. I am taking it down brick by brick though and in some cases I have even put some bricks back up in fear. I am a goal oriented person and my goal is to have a strong relationship with Jesus Christ. Can you imagine my frustration when I feel like I've exposed myself to this new church and then get embarrassed and put a few bricks back up to cover myself. I have been playing this game for 5 months. Today, I bulldozed that blockade. Today I re-dedicated myself to our forever forgiving and always loving Lord, Jesus Christ.
Today my life has been dramatically changed.
Today I put down my pride and bear all I have to proclaim.
Today I have been saved.
"But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who love your salvation always say, "The LORD be exalted!" Psalm 40:16
Until Next Time,
Peace & Love
03.17.11
I wonder why it is easier for people to tell fibs than it is to tell the truth. Those fibs put leaps and bounds between people. I understand that the truth sometimes isn't what we hopped for, or is hard to admit. I pray that you would know what the truth is in your heart and know I love you. I know prayers are supposed to be silent and done individually, but I wanted you to know I am praying. I miss you and miss what we were.
Until Next Time,
Peace & Love
03.06.11
Today at church a chord was struck in my heart. {Which is typical, but something really clicked}
If you look in the bible in Genesis 39-45, it talks about Joseph and his outlook on all of the things that are happening to him. I could repeat in length what our Pastor spoke about, but I'd like to share my opinion of what was shared. Throughout Joseph's life he is put into situations that are horrible, hard and disheartening to think about. Thinking if I were to be put in those, I'd want to put blame somewhere, or beg for a blessing to get me out. Joseph on the other hand, always took the situations he was in and made the best of them; which at times his best wasn't very good. He always had God on his side, and was blessed where ever he went. Think about the names of his two children and it will tell you the outlook Joseph had on his life. He knew he was blessed and was a blessing to others; because, he ALWAYS kept Jesus first and foremost in all he did. Joseph was a blessing to al those whom he came into contact with.
A good question to ask yourself is: Are you a blessing to those around you?
In order to be a blessing to others around you, isn't because you think you are blessed, or pay your tithe. Its about keeping an upbeat attitude when the times get hard. Being a blessing means being there for others when they need you. It is about being an example of what a good Christian is, does and stands for.
What hit me, if I look at some of the relationships I have; I don't know if I can say I am a blessing to those people. That is hard to admit, aloud at least. I have got to retrace my steps and start over with them. I need to swallow my pride more and reach out even when its uncomfortable. Ask questions that are hard and be diligent in seeking their answers.
I need to be a better Christian.
Until Next Time,
Peace & Love
03.05.11
This is my new journal page! Welcome! This is where all my thoughts will land.
I will post the picture that is currently on the home page whenever I write a journal entry.
Check back soon for updates!
Until Next Time,
Peace & Love
